�WelcometoBeWILDerwood�saidthesign,awoodenconstructionnexttoatallwoodhutforgnomes.Idon�tknowwhowasmoreexcited,myselforthekids;oneofwhom,tobeperfectlyfair,waslessthanpleasedtobeatthisbespokeeco-park.
�Awnooo�hemurmured,�whyarewehere?Whowantstoseethispark?Iwantedtostayatthecamping,sowecouldplaypool�.
�Afairpoint,Thomas�,Isaid(secretlywantingtocry),�butwecandodifferentthingsover10days.You�llsee,thiswillbeveryinteresting,thereareridesandgameslikeinLegoland!�
Ohliarliar!Itwasmyclumsyandineptattempttoenticehimintothisthingandhecouldseerightthroughme.Ihadsomehowcoercedthemintothecarfromthecampingsite,underthreatofweeklypaycutsandmore.
Nonetheless,probablysecretlyintriguedbythesignandhouse,bothchildrengotoutofthecarwithoutopposingresistanceandwepassedthegates.
Mesmerised,westartedwalkingthroughawoodenconstructionwhichwassurroundedbyreedsandabog;littlehousesoflittlepeoplewereallaroundusandasigndaredustofindasmanyaswecould.Wepassedabridge,whileahugeboatsilentlytravelledunderit,fullofsmilingpassengers.Iwavedtimidly.
Ohwhatagoodexcusetospendadayintheforest,Ithoughttomyself!Thisisthelife!Theverycoreoftheeco-camping-holiday!
Weeventuallygottoaspacewhichhostedafewtables,abar,andaviewonthe�Scaaarylake�.Theboats,werealised,wereallleavingfromhere.Neveronetomissanopportunity,Iqueuedforthenextavailableboat:thecuewasminimal,andthechildrensathappilyafewmetersawayforthetwominutesofqueueIhadtoendure.
�Iwantedthepinkone�,Nataliesaid,whenwegotontheyellowboat.
�Ofcourselovely,that�sbecausewe�lltryalltheboatsatdifferentturns!�Ichirped.Whatkindofwarpedexplanationthiswas,Idon�tknow;butexplanationsliketheseseemtoaptlyconfusethechildrenandtoanextentdistractthem,soIusetheminemergency.
�LookatMildredtheCrocklebog!�,Iexclaimed,abittoomerrilyandenergetically.Inthemiddleofthelakewecouldseeacrocodile-likebeing,onlycuter,puffingwateroutofhernostrils.
Thedisappointmentfornotridingthepinkboatevaporatedinstantly.WealladmiredtheCrockleboginthemiddleoftheScaaaryLake,huffingandpuffingandwhodidn�tlookscaryatall.Butthen,wasitmeanttobe?
Thomascouldn�tsimplytakeitanymore.
�Thisissobaby!�,heannounceddisgusted.Heisonly9byhesoundssoteen-ageyattimes.Iwonderiftheygrowupfasterthesedays.
BeWILDerwooddescribesitselfas�acurioustreehouseadventure�andisbasedontheadventuresofSwampyandhisfriends,whoonedaydaregooutofthestrictconfinesofthebogandcomebackhomewithlotsoftalestotell.
Thebookuponwhichthestoryisbasedisonsalealmosteverywhereinthepark,andthetrailthroughtheforesttakeschildrenandadultalikethroughamagicalworldofTwiggles,Crocklebogs,amagicmaze,giantspiderswearingeightpairsofshoesandofcourse,themightyBrokenBridge.Abrilliantideaforadayoutwithanecoundertone:thelivingproofthatonecanhavefunwithouttoomuchado.
Whilecongratulatingmyselfwiththechoiceofouting,IwaspainfullyawarethatIhadtoconvinceatleastonecrewmember.
Thenextattractionontheline,theBrokenBridge,atallwoodenconstructionwewereallsupposedtoclimb,providedthatopportunity,inatotallyfortuitousway.
It�samazinghowIregularlyforgetmyfearofheights.IcockilyledthewayonTheBrokenBridgeandIfoundmyselfhangingformydearlife,stuck25metreshighabovetheground,withvertigo,andnotabletomoveastepatatimewithoutfeelingfaint.Thestructureseemedratherstable,butIwasn�t;Imusthaveturnedashadeofgreen.
Thomasfoundthethingreallyentertaining.Infact,bothchildrenthoughtitwashilariousthattheirmumshouldemitsuchstrangesoundswheninthemidstofapanicattack,andgavethewholethinga10outof10mark.
Thatwasreallywhenthedaypickedupbigtime.Aftersuchjollymoments,wewenttotheWigglyWiresandtheMazeandIwaseagerlyaskedinforentertainment.Iwasactuallyforcedupthebridgeforasecondtakeandthistimetheyactuallymademeclimbthetallbit,andalthoughitwasstilldeeplytraumatising,itseemedlesssoinaway:Iprobablygotused,inaverysmallway,totheheight.That�swhyIregularlyforgetIhaveproblemswithit,ifthismakessense.
TheWigglyWireswereok,astherewasnoheightinvolved,onlyabitofspeedandthatwasfine.It�sbasicallyaseathangingfromaropeanditslidesdown,withyouonit.Theonlydownsideisthattherearetreeseverywhereandyouhavethefalseimpressionthatyouareaimingforone.Ofcourseit�sonlyanillusion,althoughIheardoneparticularlychunkydadcommentthathewastossedagainstanearbypine,accidentally.Iwonderifit�samatterofgravityandweight.Wewerejustfine.
Anotherimpressivefeaturewerethevariousslides,someofwhichwerepositivelysteep.Again,thechildrenfoundthemgreat,plusthe�piecederesistence�wasofcoursemecomingdowntheslide,themoreterrifiedthebetter.IpromiseyouIwasn�tfakingit.Justtryputtingyourbodyonaseeminglyverticalwallandjump.
Anyway,alltheselittlefamilymomentscementedadefinitelypleasurableday.
Thomasgotlostatsometime,andit�sveryeasytoloseachildinBeWILDerwood,asit�ssemi-dark(relatively)andverybusy.
Onthewaybackwecaughtthepinkboatfinally,whichtookustotheexit.Ihadswornthatthesouvenirshopwouldn�tgetanyofmyhard-earnedmoneybut,alas,Isurrendered,innameofareallyniceday.Weboughtthebook(7.99)andtwomechanicalfrogs,whichdistractedthekidsonthewaybacktoourcamping.
Intheevening,inthedarkofourtent,wereadhowSwampywentonhisepicaladventureintheforest,crossedthebrokenbridge,metMildredtheCrocklebog,anditwasallsosweetbecausewehadbeenthere.
Ohwhataday!Itwaswithnodoubtmemorable.We�vebeenandwe�llgoagain,onlythistimeI�llprobablyavoidthebridge,althoughitdoesn�tseemrealistic.WaitforusBeWILDerwood!
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